This story originally appeared on the Gents Cafe Newsletter. You can subscribe here.
A little over two years ago, I found myself in a hole. I was working all day, then getting home and scrolling through social media late into the night. I was alive, but I wasn’t living. It was one cold December night when I decided, for the 5th or 6th time, that enough was enough, and that I needed to do something.
I decided that I was going to write a bucket list, but I needed to make it big enough that it was actually going to force change. So, I decided to set myself a challenge: 100 things that inspired me, excited me, scared me—all things that I always wished that I’d do, but hadn’t, and I’d give myself just four years to complete the list.
See, for a lot of us, we sort of know what we’d like to do, but if they’re difficult, or big, or scary things, we tend to come up with excuses. If you’ve been in a rut, like I have, you can always find a reason not to do the thing that you want to do.
So, I stepped into 2024 with a sense of excitement, and change happened fast. I forced myself out of my comfort zone, setting up trips, experiences, and conversations that I’d’ve excused my way out of just months previously. I realised I’d been negotiating with myself for years, and Project Bucket List ended the negotiations.
Then, change started happening in a much deeper way. I was open to life once again. I felt excited about what the next challenge would bring, and because I’m exploring so many different facets of life, I’m meeting so many interesting people and making friends that I just never would have.
I’ve hunted rattlesnakes in Arizona, climbed glaciers in Iceland, and jumped off bridges in Spain, but I’ve also balanced these big adventures with much smaller, creative pursuits. I’ve tried life drawing, blacksmithing, and glassworking.
I’ve come to realise that one of the big lessons I’ve learnt is about time ownership. It’s so easy to sit at home and scroll endlessly, so taking ownership over what you focus on and deciding how you spend your evenings is a real act of rebellion. The tricky part is getting started, but once you stick to it and develop that momentum, you’re free.
I’m just past halfway through the list, and I owe my life to it. It’s not always easy, but by spending so much time outside of my comfort zone, I’ve become a much happier, confident person.
I still scroll sometimes. The difference is my life isn’t just that anymore.
